Healthcare Comedic Observer Gifts

"The doctor is in court on Tuesdays and Wednesdays."

"I'm afraid we'll have to operate. Your appendix has an infection and it's extremely aggressive."

'Nurse, why is there always a fly in my ointment?'

Kid with plaster cast being sawn off.

"These are my fish cymbalta, otezla, skyrizi, vraylar and stelara!"

'Time for your pills.'

"You need the toilet. . . hang on I think I've got an app for that."

The importance of paying attention in med school.

Dr. Flagg's Worst Nightmare

"We can give you enough medication to alleviate the pain, but not enough to make it fun."

'Snap out of it.'

"Norton! Put that back at once!"

"I'd like to approve a second opinion but your HMO considers that experimental medicine."

'This could be a very expensive operation — I'm going to refer you to the Federal Government.'

'It's important to treat all our patients as individuals...this for example is individual number 78/yh5-fg34c.'

'Have you heard about the new Medicare drug plan called plan C? Medicare gives you $30 for a bus ticket to Canada!'

'I think it's your colon. I came to that conclusion through the process of elimination.'

'The Doctor says you can be discharged - so I've brought you a list of jobs you can do when you get home!'

'Like I said - It's non invasive surgery.'

'You need some stress.'

'You do have catastrophic insurance, but it only applies in case of invasion from outer space.'

I don't care what happened on ER. This doctor patient relationship is not going to descend into unbridled passion.

He said he loved her for her brain but was her appendix he was always taking out.

Flyingdoctor's receptionist.

Nurse holding giant pill tells patient, 'Relax. It's chewable.'

"I've heard that your medication can grow extra nipples, but I wouldn't worry about that if I were you..."

"The operation was a success. Thank goodness for YouTube videos!"

"Yes, I have seen people in worse health than you. But, they were all dead."

Flu Drugs.

"... And who asked for your opinion, I'd like to know?!"

Fish swimming around inside drip.

"It's a very rare disease - it doesn't have a cure. It doesn't even have a spokesperson."

'If a hacker steals all my information from my health records do they keep my health problems too?'

'I'd like to be fed intravenously. I've heard about your hospital food!'

Calm down...this is for your own good.