Health Trio Pillows

"You could try watching your diet or getting more exercise – but you'll just be delaying the inevitable."

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

2021

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Self help acupuncture

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

"Do you guys serve beer?"

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

Lady drying hair whilst on exercise bike.

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

What the Doctor Ordered

'Well, well, well...'

Lactose Intolerant

"Your contents have shifted."

Mister Mid-Life Crisis

"It's not the social stigma. It's the mercury."

'No, honestly, it's just diet and exercise.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

'I'm ninety-two! Tell me what I'm doing wrong... I dare you!"

"This prognosis is positive, you've got a cold nose."

"Your bad cholesterol is trying to persuade your good cholesterol to switch sides."

"If we carry them home we’ll get at least one workout."

Express Barber Chair for Chemo Patients

We did a biopsy on the mole we removed, and it turns out it was just an old piece of chocolate.

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'