Health System Commentator Pillows

'So far, all I can tell you for sure is how much I've charged you.'

'It's a brand new state-of-the-art waiting room.'

"According to the chart you've either stabilised or flatlined."

"They used to call them G.P.s."

Take a pill so you won't be one.

"Take two of these and call my answering service in the morning."

"He may be dead but according to this survey his paperwork is WORLD CLASS!"

VACCINATION REFUSAL

"We at MEGAPHARMA are 100% behind the benefits of 'talking therapies' which is why we've developed MEGAZYMOLIN to enhance the experience..."

Obama-Health care reform

'Side effects may include loss of appetite, job, home and family.'

"Till Washington gets this healthcare issue figured out, Max here will be handling your procedure."

'Is there a doctor in the house we can trust?'

Hospital: Accident and Emergency and On Purpose and Suffering Nicely.

'He'll need some blood thinner immediately, but go grab me a sandwich first.'

MLB Owners, Players, Fans

'I don't want surgery...can you just touch up the x-rays?'

The Visitor

"His blood work doesn’t look half as bad as his HMO."

"And he can make 347,000 home visits in one night!"

'Yours is an elective surgery, so we're still deciding if we feel like doing it or not.'

Obesity in America.

'I need you to open wide, Peel.' - 'Ahhh.' - 'Not your mouth, fool! Your wallet.' - 'Arghhh!' - 'Wider!' - 'Argh!'

'Intensive and or expensive care?'

"Is there a doctor in the house to treat someone without health insurance?"

Hospital

To the highest bidder

Healthcare problems.

"The little thin girl inside you that wants to get out now weighs 200 pounds!"

"A low-level person who doesn't mean anything will see you now."

'As far as I'm concerned all this talk of 'privatisation' is just a lot of media hype!'

"Side effects include less visits by the grim reaper."

Elderly man on phone in bed - 'Press 1 if you have bed sores, Press 2 if you need to go to the toilet...'

'Now I'll show you what turns a $6,000 operation into a $17,000 operation.'