Health Humor Lover Gifts

"It wasn't really insulin. You don't have diabetes yet. It was just a warning shot."

'Too tight?'

"Please, honey, I'm with a patient, and I've asked you not to call me on this line."

"Johnson's phoned in well."

"Your last victim was so obese, you've now got diabetes!"

"Oh yes! Clearly another case of malnutrition."

'...is really all the exercise I need to lose weight.'

'Relax. I'm the Trim Reaper. I'm here for hr flabby thighs and your spare tire.'

"C'mon, walk it off!"

"Your toothache is imaginary. If it gets wors you may have to check into a dental asylum."

"Is E.Bowler here?"

'Looks like that bug has a pretty good foothold.'

'Who would like a little judo chop while you're waiting?'

"Energy drinks my foot! I've drunk 10 cans a day and now I don't have enough energy to get off the couch!"

'The only thing wrong with you is that you're holding up my golf game.'

"Hey dude - nice tattoo!"

'I didn't like to ask for a second opinion'

'They worry about their cholesterol, but they don't give a damn about ours!'

Health Club - Join and Improve Your Hindsight

'These aren't big enough to convince my family I'm really sick.'

'I'll take #1.'

'I asked my doc for a diet plan and it works great - thanks to his usurious bills, I can't afford a car or taxis and that's why I'm losing weight by walking!'

Oh, I almost forgot Doc. I also ate a granola bar last week.

'It's a clear case of dehydration.'

When I said I wanted to look at your diet....

"Have you heard about the new Diet Pill?" "I'm married to one."

'I know dieting requires a change of lifestyle, Helen, but this is ridiculous!'

"Was cutting the hole in the ice and jumping in really that good for your heart?"

"Does this antibiotic go better with a white wine, or red?"

"We made the cotton inside fluffier."

"Can you give him something to lower his temperature, after my kettle has boiled."

"There is some evidence that moderate drinking CAN be beneficial to health. . . But the advantages don't last past the first two bottles."

"Are you sure the doctor said this was better than medication for your hayfever?"

"How am I supposed to trust my gut when it can't even handle a little dairy?"

Antacid rain