Health Food Gifts

"Sure it costs more. We have to squash bugs by hand."

Fat Free Food, Salt Free Food, Cholesterol Free Food and Food Free Food.

Bulk Food/ Stuff we swept off the floor.

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

Friendly bacteria

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

Vegetarian Kebabs

Santa contemplates whether or not to leave presents.

Healthy Chocolate Co.

A panda waiting for bamboo juice

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

"Are you sure this is gluten free?"

Not eating natural foods because most people die of natural causes.

"Do you have anything with FOOD in it?"

Hot dog salesman - 'Early american or loaded with preservatives?'

Chernobyl Health Foods: None of our products are locally sourced.

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

Gentrification of the Fridge.

"Now would seem an ideal time to acquaint you with the health benefits of a vegan diet."

"It's empty because the health department banned everything inside the box."

"I've started a new diet. I'm supposed to put Worcestershire sauce on everything I eat."

There are only two types of people in the world. Those who are built for salad and those who are not.

"We're really trying to win over the male consumer."

"The yoghurt, does it contain bifidobacteriumi and lactobacillus bulgaricus?"

"Are you sure no pesticides were used?"

"What's healthy about breakfast cereals?"

Cull people who think, because it's organic, they can sell produce that's past its best.

Al's Health Spa: You are what you eat.

Cholesterol, No Cholesterol.

Health Foods; "When did I ever eat back pain and trigger fingers?"

'This snack is vegan. It's 100% artificial ingredients.'

Surveillance Cameras In Use: Video Adds 10 Pounds - 40% Off Diet Supplements.

Man with mousey nose running a health food store

"It's been 10 years Martha, why are we still eating quinoa?"

"Gluten-free low gi, I don't think so..."