Health Food Pillows

"Sure it costs more. We have to squash bugs by hand."

Fat Free Food, Salt Free Food, Cholesterol Free Food and Food Free Food.

Bulk Food/ Stuff we swept off the floor.

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

Friendly bacteria

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

Vegetarian Kebabs

Santa contemplates whether or not to leave presents.

Healthy Chocolate Co.

Chernobyl Health Foods: None of our products are locally sourced.

"Now would seem an ideal time to acquaint you with the health benefits of a vegan diet."

Gentrification of the Fridge.

Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe

A panda waiting for bamboo juice

Hot dog salesman - 'Early american or loaded with preservatives?'

"Do you have anything with FOOD in it?"

Not eating natural foods because most people die of natural causes.

"Are you sure this is gluten free?"

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

"Sorry, but the box does taste better."

"Research now shows that the food we claimed was good for you is now actually bad for you. Food we claimed was bad for you is now good for you. If you're confused, join the club."

"It's empty because the health department banned everything inside the box."

There are only two types of people in the world. Those who are built for salad and those who are not.

"We're really trying to win over the male consumer."

"The yoghurt, does it contain bifidobacteriumi and lactobacillus bulgaricus?"

"Are you sure no pesticides were used?"

"What's healthy about breakfast cereals?"

Cull people who think, because it's organic, they can sell produce that's past its best.

Al's Health Spa: You are what you eat.

Cholesterol, No Cholesterol.

Health Foods; "When did I ever eat back pain and trigger fingers?"

'This snack is vegan. It's 100% artificial ingredients.'

Surveillance Cameras In Use: Video Adds 10 Pounds - 40% Off Diet Supplements.

Man with mousey nose running a health food store

"I've started a new diet. I'm supposed to put Worcestershire sauce on everything I eat."