Health-conscious Tech Enthusiast Gifts

'This is our low cal, low cholesterol, low fat model.'

"We need to update your entire operating system."

"Speed reader...?"

Man Gives Computer Therapy/

"Just think of this prescription as an app for your body...with side effects."

"No, I'm not able to transplant your computer's antivirus software into your body. Try washing your hands more often."

"And more intriguingly, your prognosis differs depending on which search engine I use."

That's my diagnosis. If you want a second opinion, I will ask my Smart Phone

"The patient handed me this 'wearable technology' and said 'all the answers are on there'."

"I've been using the latest home tech and apps to monitor my health....And after feeding the results into some online medical sites I discovered I was dead!"

'This new diet drug comes as a pill, patch, or as a phone app with Siri saying, don't eat so much.'

"I'm getting the hang of the patient portal. It reminded me to refill my beta blocker, but I keep getting ads. Can you prescribe a good pop-up blocker too?"

"I feel fine but according to my new watch I might be DEAD!"

Cyber-Cise: 'Let's start with 3 sets of 8 reps of uploading, rest and repeat for downloading.'

A doctor checks on a patient hooked up to a complicated-looking machine.

"Nice try, but I'm not counting these as your steps. I know you're jst sitting down, eating junk food and stomping your feet on the floor."

"The doctor says your vital signs are strong, but the IT guy says your portal password is weak."

"So, how do you like your new medical website?"

'When I use my iPod, my implantable defibrillator kicks in.'

"Alright, let's Google those symptoms and see what we come up with."

"Well, if you followed me on twitter, you'd already know your diagnosis."

"That's the fifth customer this morning - video calling the doctor's surgery because of Covid restrictions."

"He won the Nobel prize for science. He invented the vibrating tampon."

'I'm downloading an exercise manual.'

'This less-weight app is great! It suggested I lie my mobile down on the scale instead of stepping on it myself and look - less-weight!'

I think the doctor will agree with me on this, Sir, you have Elephantitis!

Man waiting in line to self scan himself at a hospital.

'It's his pacemaker. h3e's not supposed to go near the refrigerator.'

Doctor checking the health of a TV

'If you want a second opinion, I'll ask my computer

"I am referring you to some alternative medicine..."

"This food app I downloaded asked me to enter my daily food consumption."