Health-conscious Planner Gifts

"I recommend using your third wish to prevent joint pain in later years."

'You know, if you can wait three weeks, cold medicine will be sale.'

'Office' block tightening it's belt

"First aid box, puncture repair kit, mobile phone, energy bars and plenty of liquids; I think that's all eventualities covered..."

'Lining my pockets with aluminum foil so I can sneak Thanksgiving leftovers home.'

"Compare Calculate Contrast Before you make a move"

'First item on the agenda...Throw out the agenda!!'

"This grade doesn't fit into my five-year plan!"

"It's definitely Friday. I'm looking at my calendar."

"Before we cut the cake, I want to thank my bride for bringing our wedding in under budget."

Monk & Mandi: "Mom, this top is too tight!"

Concern Chart

"Do you mind? I'm reading the prospectus carefully before investing."

His investment advisor gave him a new mantra.

'We can only offer you our basic dental plan: this dental floss and a pack of sugar-free gum.'

'To err is human. To really screw up requires a plan.'

"This year I'm really gonna get organized."

'Smart bloke.'

Flo's Christmas Lights: 'I really like what you've done with yawr Christmas lights this yeaw Flo.'

"But if we add to Santa's cholesterol we could be ruining him for future generations."

"You know, I wouldn't have to pay for this if you were still my son."

Sadie dear, I think we need to discuss our living wills. Our whats? We need to talk about what to do in case something happens. Like what? You know, if we get sick, or incapacitated, or wind up in a very bad state. Not following. Some people have trouble facing the issue. Oh, you mean like New Jersey?

'You can rest assured that our 'diet conscience' fund invests only in low-fat, low cholesterol food companies.'

O Christmas Tree...

'The doctor said I need more calcium in my diet, so I'm switching from dark chocolate to milk chocolate.'

'It's not looking good: Christmas is coming and the goose is on the Atkins diet.'

All this binge eating and rinking I'm doing is making me really fat so I'll need a full check-up in July 2006 - GPs must provide advance bookings.

"You're very punctual, but you may lack a little in ability to plan ahead."

Don't do it, kid. Think. Think.

Consumer Weekly �9.50 - Rip-Off Britain

Observe, Prepare, Act

'Hey, it's out of my hands. Besides, we're a team! And if in the interest of saving a few bucks we're asked to share hockey sticks, then so be it!'

Man carring plans

"I'm not convinced you're getting this, Darren."

I tell you JB, it would cost us more than we can afford