Health And Safety Awareness Advocate Gifts

Runs-With-Scissors Boy - Part Five

Clyde thought “Atomic Sparklers” was just an ad gimmick

Pool attached to child's bed.

"I'm going to need a little more for the root cause than, who'da thunk."

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

Man using to much bug spray

"It's not the first time he'd been warned about wearing a long tie when leaning over the shredder."

Executive ignores wet floor warning and slides down hall

"Getting the hang of it?"

Our college is tuned to the students' every need! Campus Visits. We have body image awareness week. Safe sex awareness week. Bullying, drug use and tolerance awareness weeks. What did I miss? Welcome. History, math or English awareness week? Great idea. I'll suggest that.

Cafe Burns.

"This isn't helping my migraine."

"Careful."

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

Daddy showed me why I should always wear my bicycle helmet!

Getting to the ER saved my life...early retirement.

"I told him not to rely on his GPS whe out running!"

'In my day, we didn't concern ourselves with wimpy notions of workplace ergonomics.'

'Okay, the motorized rocking chair could use an emergency off switch.'

'You're not retaining water. You're retaining cookies and ice cream and pizza...'

"We need warning stickers on this side warning not to ignore all the other warning stickers on the other side."

Kangaroo: Baby on Board

"You're right. I have to come up with a brake of some kind."

Under Capitalism, Expensive Equipment is Always, Unlike People, Innocent Until Proven Guilty

'Okay - who removed Jessica's sunhat..?'

Scientific Research: 'Uh...why'd it take'em 20 yeahs t' figyah that out?'

The first 10,000 fans got a concussion bobblehead!

'We want more police on our streets!' 'WHAT?! Do you have any idea how dangerous it is out there?'

Boozing and Cruising

This week is obscure charity awareness week.

Man who has hailed a taxi finds the driver is a crash test dummy.

'This is your lucky day!'

'Knowledge is the ultimate weapon. Next!'

'My horoscope says I'm due for a surprise today.'

Model employee reads 'Best Practice' document ... scruffy slob reads 'Worst Practice', with messy desk and dangerous wires.