Health And Medicine Gifts

M.D. Dermatology. Uh-oh, it looks like a case of "taxidermy"!

"Approaching 10,000 steps."

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"She's fine. She just needs some tofu."

Lady taking her little dog to the chemist with a cough

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

2021

A female patient in an exam room sees a sign that reads, 'Break glass in case of physician burnout'

'Medical school's been more challenging since the cadavers turned into zombies.'

"Good For You / Bad For You"

"Do you want to pretend to be a doctor and I'll pretend to be a hotshot civil litigation attorney who sues you till your ears bleed?"

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"Boy, am I glad they finally hired more staff!"

'If you give up alcohol, cigarettes, sex, red meat, cakes and chocolate, and don't get too excited, you can enjoy life for a few more years yet.'

"I don't think you're getting enough stress."

"Okay, now breathe another sigh of relief."

"His first out-of-body experience."

'Personally I take all these programmes with a pinch of salt.'

Self help acupuncture

"Now, how can I be of assistance?"

"It does have a side effect. You'll faint when I tell you how much it will cost to produce."

Dietician to man: 'To address your spare tire we must first get in touch with your inner tube.'

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

"I’ve tried to make this as painless as possible ... clearly I’ve failed."

"Do you guys serve beer?"

"If you don't want stitches, that's fine. Suture self."

vaccine wars.

"Waiting for the vaccine launch."

'You've hit the fitness plateau.'

'OK, the old one's in my right hand, the donor's in my left. Rght?'

'Okay, ladies! We're not just going to burn those calories, we're going to drown them!'

'I checked the database, Mrs. Nimitz. There's no such symptom.'

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'