Hazmat Hobbyist Gifts

"Geoffrey's a bit worried about lyme disease."

Two people in hazmat suits lie in bed

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

'Well, I got a hunting license and a fishing license and by golly I'm going to use them.'

The New Normal

"Good news. It wasn't a toxic chemical leak. It was an old pizza in your kid's room."

'Remember, before entering, make sure you wipe your feet on the hazmat.'

"No word from the company – but, it's clear that this is a major spill."

"It's not safe to keep meeting like this."

'So this is what you do while I'm away,'

"I've got the ninth grade chemistry class this term."

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

"Renovating your bathroom?"

Silver Sufferer - husband looking at steam trains on the internet, wife bored in background

"OK, now I want everybody to put their hands together and make something with tools!"

'You know, if you cleaned the litter box more often, you wouldn't have to wear the hazmat suit.'

Man in a hazmat suit on a COVID-19 wrecking ball.

They didn't tell me what to do with it. I thought they told you what to do with it.

With the help of his trusty guide, Mr. Fluffbo becomes the first cat to scale Mt. Everest.

"Oh really, Gerald! You're removing honey from the hives, not plutonium!"

Radioactive Pizza

You should all get along beautifully. Fred handles toxic wastes, Doris works at a nuclear reactor, and Walter just isn't taking any chances.

"You know, Burkhart, if you're so damn afraid of the flu maybe you should just stay home."

A tanker truck with a warning on the back that reads "The scientific community is divided. Some say this stuff is dangerous, some say it isn't".

"Have you ever had the feeling you forgot to turn something off?"

"Hazmat's been very good to me. But my first real love is still beekeeping."

Irradiated pizza

"Whew, that was rank. I didn't want that baby trapped in this suit. I might have died!"

'You come in for one thing, and they get you filling in all kinds of forms...'

"Remember when we used to worry about him bringing home nits?"

'Next time, we should clean up the microwave before it comes to this.'

Too Much Information.

Model Airplanes

Life on Earth - Burglear's doctor.

"....But....flu season's over."