Hazard Hawk Gifts

"He says: If they're smart enough to hire a top lawyer and sue us for having wet floors then they're smart enough to look where they're *%&$* going..."

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

'I'm getting some unusually high readings around you.'

Cuba detected a variant of HIV

'Ed' 'Op-ed'

'You had a 9 on one, a 7 on two, a 10 on three, a 23 on four...that hurt...'

Hazardous substance - ignitable, corrosive, reactive, toxic, real smelly, yucchy.

Ebola Clinic

'Larry, did you replace the cartridges in all the respirators this morning?'

No one liked working the red-eye shift.

"I admit - as papercuts go it's quite a serious one."

'Are you OK Justin? You don't look very well.'

'So, Bill! What do you think my chances are of moving into supervisory position?'

"I wouldn't reach in there to retrieve your ball. I learned that lesson the hard way."

Man at Medical Waste conference says - 'Hello?'

'He's an experienced golfer! Experienced in sand traps, water hazards and slicing.'

Caution falling books

"You ever look around for something, and then realize you were holding it?"

"Your bill includes a 10% surcharge that goes towards raising awareness of the rampant overcharging in the legal fraternity."

"He was a firm believer in rolling up his sleeves."

"Don't worry...with his swing, this is the safest place to stand."

Golfer hits a plane on his drive.

'Talk about rough courses!'

'And to think I worried about safe sex.'

"Where are the fire exits?"

Hazards ALWAYS exist!...

Eyes Open!...

"Gawd, I hate these water hazards!!"

Don't Do Jack and the Beanstalk.

'This one is for staying a hawk, in world full of doves.'

'Since this sinkhole showed up, this is an easy par 3.'

"Now where was that oil, must remember to sort it before someone takes a tumble..."

Tiger in the rough.

'Eddie, I'l taking you out of big oil and putting your money into Hazmat suits.'