Having A Second Child Gifts

'The ideal number of children per family is two.'

The Baby Walker

"No, there was no 'Buy One, Get One Free.' You're twins."

'Will you pipe down? I'm in a business meeting.'

Mr. & Mrs. Stickfigure are expecting twins.

Baby tells other Baby to call.

"You go out first. Signal me if it's safe!!"

"She said that girls mature faster than boys, so I pulled her hair."

'It's too early to say but my lad may be good enough to swim professionally.'

'It was romantic before we had kids. Build some stairs.'

'Hi, I'm Bob and I'll be your waiter ... and this is my wife, Susan, and her two children from a former marriage, Jimmy and Cindy.'

"Remember, she had twins, so I go in first, and then you follow about 3 minutes later."

Mother Goose Timeshare

'I told that boy no snacks before dinner, , ,'

'I'm afraid this doubles your bill.'

'What makes you think I want a trophy wife?'

'You could say this is how my husband and I support local arts.'

The unforgiving tree

Mother pushes twins on a double-decker swing.

Maternity ward: 'Oh boy - stereo!'

'Don't worry, son. This bed inking incident will be our little secret.'

Milk sideburns

"You're fatigued, run down, anxious, with high blood pressure, back ache, and a general malaise. You've got kids."

"Sure, I'd get married again, but who wants a she-wolf with two adopted children?"

"He says he loves me, but he still uses his first wife's birthday as his password."

'They were going to get married when they were young, but he kept forgetting the wedding date!'

'I bet you could walk down the aisle blindfolded now,eh,Gloria?'

'What's the plural of baby?'

"I'd put his name down for Eton if I could spell it!"

'Are we there yet?.. Are we there yet?.. Are we there yet?..'

Why you must go to work

man juggling career, home and children

'Hi, honey?we're home!'

'Breastfeeding twins doesn't sound that hard to me...'