Happy Smoker T-Shirts

A smoker's smoke turns into the contrail of a plane.

Professional woman in pub

'It's a nicotine patch...I've been smoking too much.'

"Since I've gone over to roll-ups I find I can get by on just one cigarette a day!"

"The other reindeer sent me back to the smoking section."

"I could easily change to a healthier lifestyle, but then I'd live longer and be a burden on my loved ones in my old age."

'I haven't had the urge for a cigarette for two days. How's the patch working for you?'

'So OK. . . I should quit smoking, but I scratched that off my bucket list years ago!'

'I'm just checking my e-cigarette.'

"Any pain relief with the cannabis?"

Nature is not perfect

'We don't get many takers for the smoking section anymore.'

'...And maybe they know something about passive smoking you don't.'

'Hey man that's a gas!'

'My doctor's fit note suggested a phased return to work. I'll see you for another smoking break tomorrow.'

Sergei Rachmaninov

Man offers coffee with smoke.

'I'm not up here seeking wisdom - this is the only place they'll let me smoke.'

"It's for you."

'Not only is smoking permitted, we insist on it!'

"I really love grandma and all, but she stinks of vape."

'He knew he was hyte when his last locofoco seemed gynecoid.'

'Finally I can enjoy a smoke without this constant fear that some day it'll kill me!' (smoking in heaven)

'You know, I wouldn't mind all this fiber if I could smoke it.'

'I don't understand why people say I'm having trouble quitting.'

No Smoking.

Drugs and Rock & Roll

'Let me get this straight. Your nicotine patch back fired on you?'

"I'm thinking of giving up social media. . . shouldn't be too difficult, I did quit smoking in the noughties."

Man going out for a cigarette from a lighthouse.

Vicar blowing smoke halo.

'I'll only have one pack of nicotene patches this week. My mate's supposed to be getting me some cheaper ones from abroad.'

No Smoking Building.

'Hey, pal - got a light?'

"Excuse me, is this a smoking area?"