Happy Drinker Gifts

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

'We like the occasional drink on the patio.'

A cat pours himself a gin and tonic.

7 Dwarves of Retirement

"I know my drinking limits.The problem is that I can never reach them - I simply fall down."

Al, why is my goldfish zigzagging? Perhaps sharing my beer with him was a case of misplaced generosity on my part.

The Reaper's Arms

"Honestly, Paula, I don't know what I'd do without our daily keggers."

'Hey, pal... do you have a wine that tastes like beer?'

'Looks like a good day fah haulin' lobstah, eh, Pauley?...Let's just say it became a good day fah drinkin'...'

'Beer's more than just a food -- it's a comfort food!'

"The Ususal, Mr. B?"

"So, Danny Boy, what's up in your world?"

'She thinks I'm out every night training for the London Marathon.'

'No need for pump action, Al - it's the wife.'

Is your glass half full or half empty? Who cares, fill her up!

'Your switching to Scotch? And after I've given you the best beers of my life!'

"I opened the last of the emergency wine."

'Malty tasking.'

"You're looking a bit RUFF this morning."

Wine at the Bar

'Just one more and this puppy is headed for another bar.'

"It's pumpin spice latte season - I feel it in the air."

"I thought I put on my 'big boy' pants this morning but apparently they were my 'fire me' pants."

"It's easy for me. Three beers and I'm in the zone."

Getting old...

'We can't go on knocking it back like this - one of us must give it up, won't you!'

'I'll be home for dinner pretty soon, dear — I just stopped off to cleanse my palate.'

"Hail to thee, blithe spirit!"

"Right, let the consumption of alcohol begin."

"I love people-watching."

''Is there anybody there?'

"Some prop-forward he's turned out to be."

Cause and Effect.

'Honey, I got locked in at the corner wine shop. Can you call the police and let them know - in about nine hours?'