Handbrake Hero Gifts

'O.K., I admit I'm impressed by your handbrake skills but does reverse gear work?'

Knight in shining Lycra!

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

Unable to afford scaffolding, Dave ties plungers on his feet to get up a wall.

The Workaholics Building

"Well, come on Son, don't keep us in suspense. Did you pass your driving test?"

The Pocket Knife Tool Belt

Bird wife unhappy with the state of their birdhouse.

'So then I thought, what's the idea job for a gentleman with my years of experience, wisdom and a desire to help others.'

"Here comes someone now. If we're lucky they haven't had their fly shot, or won't wash their hands!"

"Here's a video showing how to fix a toilet. It shows a guy calling a plumber."

Born to play ball.

"Frankly, we're just keeping out heads above water."

Procrastinators Anonymous: Just wait and see.

"I'm an entrepreneur."

'Your feet are killing me!'

'Samaritans, mission control'

Doctor monitoring his own heart attack.

Do your own conveyancing...Do it yourself plumbing and heating...Embalm your own relatives.

"I work twelve hours a day to make ends meat...but then I'm way too knackered to cook it!"

Caution.

A handlebar moustache.

Road-rage speedometers.

"The last time I made money was on the day I sold one of my kidneys..."

"It may make me look dumb, but it's technically just as dangerous as a motorcycle."

Children on harnesses being pulled apart by their mothers.

'OK Smith, you can take this back to the Woodwork room now!'

"I'm clean, Officer! I just washed 'em."

'Do you or do not want to be a member of this team, Henson? If so, I suggest you go back and run to first base this time.'

"Another week, another dollar. It seems like life is nothing but work, work, work! But there's nothing wrong with that! I like being busy. And boy, I'm always busy!"

Traffic avenger

"Remember, measure twice, cut once, stand baffled, string together obscenities."