Handlebar Hero Gifts

A handlebar moustache.

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"Well, at least we know she died peacefully."

"How long were you in that headstand?"

Your Guide to Winning Movember

"As it's your birthday, would you like to go in the Big Chair?"

'My purse! The original 24-hour pharmacy.'

"Oh, go on Jeffrey. . . Give him an order!"

"Fire one shot if you find a waterhole or two for a coffeeshop."

Baby with straw to eat out of bib.

The Workaholics Building

Philip Nye – cycle chiropractor

'I'm racing him in the 4.30.'

Babies who Lunch.

Baby clinging to beard

'You know Doug just isn't a morning person. This afternoon's not looking too good, either.'

"Here's a video showing how to fix a toilet. It shows a guy calling a plumber."

Golf Myths - The Perfect Game.

A man working on a model airplane

"You had me at pumpkin."

'Say, Doc, I'll need more of that steroid stuff for old King. He's still kind of peaked. Must need some heavy doses."

"Frankly, we're just keeping out heads above water."

One Man Band

"It's getting harder and harder to be different around here."

"I work from home. Well, technically my parents' home. I live in their basement."

"I'm an entrepreneur."

Princess Anne

Zap Energy Drinks!

'Your feet are killing me!'

The Zealous Huntsman

"I work twelve hours a day to make ends meat...but then I'm way too knackered to cook it!"

"... And you're absolutely certain that this isn't a mirage?"

'Sorry I'm late, but I'm actually driving one of these things.'

'O.K., I admit I'm impressed by your handbrake skills but does reverse gear work?'

"The last time I made money was on the day I sold one of my kidneys..."