Halloween Enjoyer Pillows

"But I don't want free financial advice. I just want candy."

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

"Boil, toil and trouble, I wish I'd never started this risotto."

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

Transylvanian backpackers.

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

'He likes to power nap.'

Toadstools

'One eye of newt or two?'

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

"Home depot."

Dead Funny

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

"I was almost that last year."

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

Night of the Zombonies.

Zombies.

"I'm spooked - they don't want candy, they want ice water!"

"Fred's had too much to drink - now he's hitting on that old coat rack."

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

"I said slime."

'Trickle or Spray!?'

"The Monster Mash wasn't just about having fun. We were protesting Vietnam."

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

Broomstick crash.

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

'Awesome mummy costume!' 'I'm a pirate! Some kids just TPed me...'