Halloween Devotee Pillows

"We can't all go as Elsa from 'Frozen.' "

"It's the great pumpkin's psychotic uncle Mitch, Charlie Brown."

"He's taken buzzed to a whole new level."

"This ain't no trick or treat, mister, this is a stick-up! Give me your cash, credit cards, jewelry...and that candy bar!"

"I'd like to buy a BOWEL."

Here's one for you... she likes long lurches in the moonlight, scared of fire... enjoys terrorizing villages...

"It's not necrophilia if you're both dead."

Monster Baseball. The team's continuing to have some problems this season. Jekyll is good one day and bad the next. Dracula only shows up for night games. The Mummy is always covered in bandages and on the injured list. And King Kong can't keep his mind on the game --- Whenever he sees a pretty woman, he climbs up into the stands after her! At least Frankenstein has been pitching great again, just like when he was young! Yeah, he has a completely new arm!

Transylvanian backpackers.

Toadstools

'He likes to power nap.'

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

'One eye of newt or two?'

"Home depot."

"To be honest, I don't believe in ghosts."

Dead Funny

Night of the Zombonies.

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

"I was almost that last year."

"Why am I always the designated driver?!"

"Hey! Where's that black cat? My ride's ready!"

A spider is afraid of another spider's mask.

'Good news - basic black is being shown this season.'

"What are you looking at, four eyes?"

Zombies.

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"The Monster Mash wasn't just about having fun. We were protesting Vietnam."

"I'm spooked - they don't want candy, they want ice water!"

"I said slime."

"If you wish to manifest here, you'll have to change. We don't allow anything past 1950."

"There it was again...SOOIE! And then she realized the pig call was coming from inside the house!"

Doglike man to vampire: 'Call me an apprentice werewolf, or even a beginner werewolf, but don't call me an under werewolf!'

"My great-great-grandfather was forced to flee Europe because of religious persecution."

Woodpecker carving pumpkins

"Fred's had too much to drink - now he's hitting on that old coat rack."