Habitual Slacker Gifts

"I wouldn't say he was a creature of habit - more of a creature with bad habits."

"Kindergarten, first grade,second grade, third grade...when do we get to retire?"

"I didn't come all this way to do work."

The theory that ‘Time is Relative' came to the professor during a Decelerated Math Class.

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

'At least I don't have his life.'

"I enjoy the one day of the school year...that I didn't forget to do my homework."

'Jenkins, about these coffee breaks of yours...'

"I got it in a novelty shop. But it has decreased loitering around the watercooler with 29%!"

'If anyone's still interested, the definition of entropy is ^,'

"Won't your boss miss you?"

"It took years of hard work to get my colleagues to expect nothing from me."

Boss With Whistle.

Intermediate Slouching.

The Sedentary Dead.

Under zealous: ZZZZZZ!

Who...what...why...when...where...whatever...

"Actually, turns out my entire life can take place at 10%."

Sundayafternoon Carpenters

Man in office watching TV instead of a computer monitor.

'I'm running late again this morning...' - '...in the vain hope that somebody will fire me.' - 'Gah. My life is ridiculous.'

'Some guys wait awhile before showing their true colors. I appreciate you not wasting any time.'

"Stop doggin' it!"

"If God wanted me to go to church he wouldn't have put football on Sundays."

'Out to Hunch.'

'You know sooner or later they'll notice you've replaced your monitor with a portable TV.'

He had an accident at work-an idea struck him.

'I know but I have to consider him irreplaceable until I figure out what he does around here.'

'You wanted to see me when I woke up?'

'I don't feel like getting out of bed today - Just tell everybody to go with laissez-faire.'

"You know I'd help if it weren't for my bum knee."

"I act unreliable so people won't ask me to do anything."

"What is the first item on the to do list?"

"Have you seen Joey?"

"Guess which one I made with a 3-D printer."