Habit Analyser T-Shirts

'You lost something, didn't you. . . You're looking for something. What is it? Well, you're driving me nuts. I'm going shopping.'

Proud of herself for "never owning a tv" Emily watches eight episodes of a mediocre tv show on her laptop while in bed.

'It must be a problem of interpretation. I've read this book DOZENS of times, and I keep winding up here!'

"Why can't I get anything done unless I'm totally stressed out about it?" "Is it possible to be relaxed and still be productive?" "What is wrong with my brain?" "Why don't you work better?"

Some cars need a backseat steering wheel.

Giving Things Up For Lent.

"I think I see a miscreant in the carpark. There's no time to call the police I must deal with it myself."

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

'Look! Man has been here!' 'Yeah, it must have been a man because the seat was left up.'

'You're docile enough alright, but I don't like how you grind your teeth while you sleep!'

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

Seeing the marriage counselor.

'Now don't forget what I told you - no touching!'

Latest science behind social distancing advice

"He downloaded one of those apps that helps you quit smoking."

Shut Yer Yapper and be Happy, Loser! There's a ton of so-called simple self-help books. The five most important questions: 7 habits of highly effective people: 7 steps to living at your fullest potential. Too many steps! She's going to be filthy rich.

"Well, last year I kicked gambling. . . the odds are 3 to 1 the New Year will be a good one."

"Because you always do that with your fingers."

'I want to speak with you about your work habits.' 'You mean work is habit forming?'

Smoking Cessation Clinic - Formerly The Pub.

'I've decided to narrate my own like in the third person today', he said - 'Oh, God. Not this again', she uttered plaintively. - 'Shut. Up.', she bellowed threatiningly at the fleeing man.

Addiction Research Centre.

'Sister Agatha you're flirting with another bad habit,'

'Scanning articles without finishing them on the Internet is affecting you. You're not finishing anything.'

'Stop repeating yourself, Brown!'

"I wouldn't usually say, 'she's always copying me' is grounds for divorce."

"And do you, Robert, mind if I smoke?"

"Stop tensing your abdominals!"

'You don't even know you're doing it, do you?'

'That's it - I'm leaving home!'

Human Cull: People who constantly sniff, instead of blowing their nose.

'I was dating a weatherman, but he had this annoying habit of always talking up a storm.'

Gps to advise on 'lifestyle' issues

'That's the thing when you start living with someone - you discover all of their little habits.'

"I keep reading 'Lord of the Rings' over and over again...!"