Gym Humorist Gifts

'I don't think that's what the pharmacist meant when he said 'Take for two days and skip a day.''

"How much does it cost to buy a membership then never use it?"

Woman and sport trainer

'It's so much more enjoyable since we got an electric one.'

'I see the marching season's over for the year.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

Ask me about my thick neck.

Obese man using a exercise machine. His false teeth are flying out.

Unflexible man puts shoes on stall to touch his toes.

Man in a gym decides to use a sail on the rowing machine.

Weight lifter straining on toilet

As soon as the owner's back was turned, Bob tried to ride off without paying.

"Then, someone hit on the idea of selling our torture devices to fitness centers."

"My fitness goal is to be able to shop till I don't drop!"

'Ha! Here's your problem. You haven't been taking the human growth hormones. Someone sold you some other kind of hormone.'

Balloons On Barbell.

The Paul Ryan Workout.

Woman and a dog on a treadmill with a sign reading 'Dinner Is Just Around The Corner'

Stationary bicycles.

'My personal trainer is starting to get too personal.'

"I need to lose weight to fit into my workout clothes."

But Coach, how am I supposed to do chin-ups?

'If I can touch my toes I can touch dessert.'

Boxer

"I love strong coffee."

Changing Room Exhibitionist.

'Can you touch your toes?'

Donald Trump struggles to keep up all of the promises he made.

On the back of the t-shirt...

"How's your exercise class going?"

"I guess I misunderstood when I read you were into 'Bodybuilding'."

One afternoon down at the gym.

"'A good exercise program takes it off in places that need taking off...and puts it on in places that need putting on.'"

"Ideally I'd like to lose twenty pounds in loose change."

"I came here to get in shape, young man! What does me picking up your bar bill have to do with it?"