Gut Instinct Guru Gifts

Global Forecasting Institute

Sales Dept. is Out to Hunch

"What did you say about the health of my gut biome?"

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

Self help acupuncture

You only have time for one: Choose your fighter - Exercise, Wash Your Hair, Eat, Breathe

"All I do is swim and eat plankton, but do I lose weight?"

'I'm just not sure how much more I can teach you.'

'Eat less. Drink less. Be merry more.'

'He was just saying that all things come to him who waits and, sure enough, along came a lightning bolt.'

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'

'I'm afraid that serves you right for not wearing your safety goggles!'

"I'd like to start the 'Wellness at Work' training by offering you some guidance on diet and exercise."

"Here...let me call an expert...someone who knows about these things."

"Forget sugar and spice and everything nice. I'm going for buns of steel!"

'You may not feel any healthier right away, but you'll definitely feel more smug.'

National Academy of Sport

Congratulations on the new you!

'I gotta lose some weight.'

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

Keep Fit.

'When I turned 18 something started happening to me every month. I started receiving a credit card bill.'

Tired executive going into gym coming out gleaming

"Please don't kill me."

"You're sick of this? Just try to imagine how we feel."

'Apply that ointment as directed and call me if the growth does not reduce or it starts to talk.'

"Your bedside health care book ... thanks for not reading it."

'Follow this diet, and soon the temple of your soul will just be a small chapel.'

How to cope in Los Angeles vs. New York

"I want to have at least two children - I have too much guilt to give for just one."

Humpty Dumpty in Occupational Therapy

'Look honey! I can touch my knees!'

'Have you been working out?'

"Ever since the elevator broke down, we've learned that our staff is in desperate need of a fitness program. Especially, since we're only one floor up."

'Are you the guy who put gluten in the bread?'