Gulf Coast Dweller Gifts

'Finally, everything is back to normal!'

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

'Life is great' down on the farm.

Cat says of armadillo, 'It's one of those big armored rats.'

"As near as I can figure, we're in the Unpainted Desert!"

A man in a car waits for a large herd of cows to cross the road; once they have crossed he finds a cow sitting in the passenger seat of his car.

'Arf! Arf!'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'Being stuck on a desert island is one thing, but being struck on a desert island with a hoarder...'

Crocodile

Mohammad's motors

"You may be in love, but can you support my daughter on what a herring makes?"

'Have you had a brazilian?'

'It's the newest thing out. A big screen fish finder.'

Florist "Say it with cacti"

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

'Not likely - the last time I went in one of those, it sank!'

"Today's numbers. . . seashells up one, lobsters up three, claims down one, mussels up one . . ."

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

"My family argues so much over living in the city or country that it makes me feel like pulled pork."

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

'I've just realised where we went wrong.'

"A cactus! Darling, you're such a romantic..."

New Planning Body in beauty spot - 'Nice spot for our HQ...'

"Alright be cool. We're just gonna ask for an autograph and be on our way."

You have the flu. Get plenty of rest and avoid lots of fluids.

High tide.

'A great location and only one step from the beach.'

"Efficiency tombs available"

'I'm really thirsty.'

Giraffe looking out of a lighthouse.

Lighthouse

'Wow... What did you use for bait?'

Boss, I got your memo. Why can't I talk about the ancient pyramids with the patrons? You misread that, minion. I want you to talk about the pyramids even more. Throw in the Sphinx, while you're at it. I've noticed a 4.35 spike in sales of cold drinks every time you bring up desert-based topics. You're taking all the fun out of human interaction. From now on, you're to carry around a small cactus at all times.

'Don't just stand there! Take me to your leader!'