Seaside Homeowner Gifts

"Looking on the bright side, we should get fifty quid for the lawnmower."

"Thanks! Carl put his heart and soul into it, along with, of course, lots of mud and a boatload of his own saliva."

Scene of seagull troops about to charge a picnic.

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

Mermaid Art

'Sophie has discovered Gehry.'

New Hampshire Minute

Young ladies ponder the relationship of a man with a young boy

'Oh look, the tide is coming in.'

"At last we own our own apartment. I feel like a king."

Sandy Floss

The Climate Change Debate Explained

"Oh, boy. Comfort food."

High tide.

'Mom, can I take the beach home as a souvenir?'

"To hear the sounds of the seas press 1, for all other options, or, to speak with a customer advisor, please press 2."

A bath at Boulogne. - Appalling position of Mr and Mrs Tomkins, who had a jib horse when the tide was coming in.

'Can't you forget work for ONE day?'

"There'll be another case of deliberate nobbling if I get my hands on you lot."

'That's it. Now, give me a big smile!'

Champagne and Oysters

Summer Sketches - A Sea Lion

Rubber Ring

"There's a less crowded and more attractive beach at the newly renovated, moderately priced Hotel del Mar, in nearby . . ."

Damp? Only when the tide is very, very high.

Accident near the Pier

Hercules Poirot meets Pierrot

'I don't believe for one minute that an octopus crawled up last night and ate all the coconuts!'

'How'd you get my shell phone number?'

Punch and Judy - Soon to be a major motion picture.

"You usually don't see the classics wash up on the beach these days."

'Yeah it's very Brighton!'

Punch & Judy. 'The policeman's been replaced by a traffic-warden with extended powers'.

"It's the last time we do a beach holiday"

Fortune telling