Guests T-Shirts

'Keep carving, there are still a few identifiable parts.'

'I hope you don't mind. My wife is fussy about our funiture.'

'Brew?'

'I told you she is a bad cook - that's just defrosting the chips.'

'Your job is to see that no one interrupts while I'm on a roll.'

'Have you tried our home-made wine?'

Two grooms/wedding guests raise a glass.

'So much for your theory that mixing two 50-point-rated wines equals one rated 100.'

'If your name's not on the Liszt, you're not coming in.'

'Just three pieces of cake for 200 hundred guests?'

"This is a little awkward, but you've been our guest for a while now, and we all have work in the morning..."

"Why on earth do you insist on coming to this miserable, isolated, rocky, small island every year to roost? It's covered in guano! Disgusting..."

Wedding Selfie

"Boy am I in trouble! How was I supposed to know that what I was scratching is called a "Wedding Dress"? She's so mad right now!"

'I'm the groom's broker and I'll be seating you before the ceremony begins. Technical analysts will be sitting on the left, and fundamental analysts will be on the right.'

"Before I say, I do. Just let me run those vows past my best lawyer."

"This should be cozy. Just let me know if you need an extra sousaphone."

St Peter: 'The bike can stay. You, on the other hand, aren't on the list.'

'Oh, that's Corky's way of saying hello.'

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

'And do you, Desiree, take plan B to be your lawfully wedded...'

'You wished to see the house red?'

'Why is it when ever we have guests, you have to go and make a scene?'

"What might you have written that I might say I've read?"

'I don't think they are playing with a full deck.'

'That explains why I have so much trouble parallel parking.'

'I'm the bride's ex boyfriend. Before she says yes, can I just tell her that I've just won the lottery jackpot?!'

"Has anybody seen the groom?"

Groom flees wedding

'Oh I can't stay here, i'm allergic to shell fish.'

A bride and groom hold their guests up with the wedding cake knife.

'I've got to go - we're having the zebras for dinner.'

Fluffy was never quite the same after Aunt Ruby's visit.

'I'm getting really tired of your friend crashing here every night!'

"Have some more tea, Mrs. Van Sickleford. Wendell is going to show you his mastodon tusk."