Grumpy Humor Gifts

"Oh, my arthurs a breeder too, contempt mainly!"

"He was a grouch when I met him. It was love at first gripe."

"There has been a sharp increase in his cantankerousness."

"I do wish Henry could run into someone from the dress business to talk to."

'You're so nice and friendly that I've got nothing to moan about. That's a bit of cheek!'

Grumpy old merry men.

Old Man Journal

"Don't worry, he's improving. We'll have him up and cursing the government again."

Meeting at the Grumpy Old Men's Pub.

'I swear I didn't know you'd heard that joke before...'

'I know how you feel.'

"Sometimes, on days like this, I feel like the world is conspiring to make me happy."

'Self-help books for cynics'

"If you're going out, pick up some candles."

"To be perfectly honest, Tarquin, I get fed up listening to your stories about 'the good old days'."

"He might be moody, but he's the best in the city...and worth every penny!"

At the Irritable Bowel Syndrome Convention.

I brought your coffee and a list of new things about the world you're going to have to learn to accept

"People keep telling me that it takes more facial muscles to frown than it does to smile... I tell them that I am working out."

Uncle Murray Weekly

"Well, we’ve covered the weather, my prostate, your incontinence … I suppose our idiot children are up next?"

"He's learning how to mutter in Spanish

"Is everything okay, dear? You're smiling!"

"We managed to resuscitate him, but he's still very critical."

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're just getting grumpier.'

'No.'

Wife about mad man leaving church: 'You'll have to excuse my husband. He always wakes up grumpy.'

"Everything okay, Wilson?"

Moan Pig.

'Face it Marvin, you're a madstrom of conflicting emotions.'

'The problem with politics is politicians!'

Early season snow and the following thaw got all the snowmen grumbling...