Grumpy Gus T-Shirts

Moanathon.

Sign on desk reads: 'Thanks for not wishing me a nice day.'

I'd like to take this menu and shove it where the sun don't shine. But I'll settle for the omelette & hash browns...

Mood swings: Swing 1 - 'Looks like it's going to be another wonderful day!' Swing 2 - 'Who CARES link brain! I hope it rains acid!!' Swing 3 - 'I think i'm going to CRRRY!'

Meeting at the Grumpy Old Men's Pub.

'I try to avoid the trap of letting my idleness define me.'

Old Man Journal

'He lives in a house, and it's by the side of the road, but he's still not a friend to man.'

Grumpy Old Men

'Kids get right up my nose!'

'To be honest, you're the only one who sometimes bothers to hear my complaints.'

"To be perfectly honest, Tarquin, I get fed up listening to your stories about 'the good old days'."

Whinge drinkers: 'Music is too loud as usual', 'You can never get a seat'.

"If you're going out, pick up some candles."

'Sunnyside down.'

'Please don't say a word to me until my coffee gets right...about...here.

At the Irritable Bowel Syndrome Convention.

'Quick, the coffee!'

"Oh, my arthurs a breeder too, contempt mainly!"

Uncle Murray Weekly

Beware of Curmudgeon!

"Well, we’ve covered the weather, my prostate, your incontinence … I suppose our idiot children are up next?"

'FQ...?'

"Being in the now today sure ain't like the good ol' now!"

"Tuna on rye, hold the smile."

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're just getting grumpier.'

'Maybe the world isn't getting less friendly, maybe you're getting grumpier.'

'The problem with politics is politicians!'

'Face it Marvin, you're a madstrom of conflicting emotions.'

"No more cross buns for you!"

Grumpy old men: I was an nwanted child, even my mother left me before I was born.

Pissed-off hour.

Moan Pig.

'Mrs Gridlington doesn't like being referred to as 'duck' or 'dearie'...so I just call her 'the old trout'!'