Group Therapy Member Gifts

Optimists Anonymous - chart extension.

"Here we are."

"And that's when the therapist suggested… exposure therapy!"

"You might be interested in our encounter group for people with transmission problems."

"Hello, my name is Karl and I'm addicted to speaking to small groups of strangers."

"And last week I nearly crashed while reading on the freeway..."

'To foster a sense of trust, I always like to end each session with a group hug.'

Support groups for car repairs.

'Life can be tough, Peel.' - 'Yes.' - 'But you have to stay positive.' - 'Yes' - 'You have to keep telling yourself, 'This loser is funding my holiday to Hawaii.' - 'Yes.'

'I hear you're quite an advocate of group therapy.'

"I feel proud of the success I've made, thanks for all your support."

"It's my 30-day chip. One month catnip free."

"I appreciate couples therapy, but I can't stop fantasizing about group therapy."

'Group hug anyone?'

Latest support group: British actors who couldn't get a part in the Harry Potter films.

Egomaniacs Anonymous - "There's nothing anonymous about me!"

'And now Patrick will tell us how music has helped him with his problems.'

Life can be beautiful, Al. But for you, the fly in the ointment is your self-loathing. So, my question to you is, what's the fly doing in the ointment? The backstroke!

Short Term Memory Loss Support Group: 'Good evening. You're probably all wondering why you just walked into this room.'

"Please join me now in a group meditation."

"I provided the comic relief and said all the right things like 'Yee haw!' And 'You got that right, boss!' . . . But he ditched me anyway!"

Sadly, Barbara was the only one to show up at the support group for those with abandonment issues.

Group discount therapy.

'If they didn't have on-site daycare, I wouldn't even be able to come to these meetings.'

'Welcome to Narcissists Anonymous. Now before we get started let's talk about me for awhile.'

"You think you've been kicked-around a lot? Try being me for a day..."

'Oh yeah! My self help group knows a lot more than your psychiatrist. First of all, there's a lot more of them.'

Breathe-aholics Anonymous: 'Hi, my name is Glen, and I've been clean and sober for over one minute.'

Insomniacs Anonymous - No Snoring

The Electric Fence Survivors Support Group

"Instead of national health care, we're going to try a little group therapy today...."

A meeting in which issues are resolved and a meeting.

"I relapsed."

"We may be lost, but we can still have a purpose!"

"It's nice to get out of the house and yell at my kids somewhere else for a change."