Group Gift Enthusiasts T-Shirts

"Of course contributing to Sally's wedding gift is strictly voluntary...naturally I'llave to list you as not contributing on the company website!"

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

"I can't imagine why we didn't think of this before."

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

'As a token of friendship we present to you this sacred albino fawn.' 'We sailed all the way across the Atlantic Ocean, and all you have is light deer?!'

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On the fifth day, Neville opts for jewelry.

'We leave for France tomorrow. I just can't wait to visit all those famous museum gift shops!'

The Re-Giving Tree

'Wait until you see what you got me!'

"Read the card! Read the card!"

Christmas Dwarves

"I'm not giving up the present till I see the party bag."

"...And don't forget to include the receipts!"

Adrenaline is flowing down there with lots of last-minute, panicked Christmas shoppers! The DNA is frantically looking for heirlooms that'll be passed on in succeeding generations. It seems no price is too high for the helium atom - it's buying everything! Meanwhile, the neutron can't charge and hasn't been able to buy a single gift! Tempers are getting short! A big nerve angered other shoppers by blatantly cutting in the checkout line! And there's a quarrel over a parking spot with a whit

"Let's welcome our new member, Bob!" "You, too!" "'You, too'? Idiot!"

'What I really want, Santa, is a front row seat for the Olympic Beach Volleyball games.'

Russian Doll Christmas

"I see many gifts. They say do not open till Christmas."

"I provided the comic relief and said all the right things like 'Yee haw!' And 'You got that right, boss!' . . . But he ditched me anyway!"

"Honey - this is soooo special!"

'You're kidding? Your birthday wasn't REALLY six weeks ago was it, darling?'

'Where are you, Mrs. Harris? I have another delivery for you.'

'It's my stool sample.'

'Just what I wanted. Not!'

December 24th and the December 26th.

"Sorry I'm late. Argos was a nightmare."

'Eric, who gave me a handmade bookmark for Christmas, gets a 62 percent on the midterm. Ann gave me a mug. She gets a 71. Gina gave me a weekend for two in Vienna. She scored a 98!'

'You remembered our anniversary!'

"Well, who's it from? I don't take blind submissions."

I think the real question is, why do I feel I have to give out toys? Can't people like me just for me?

"The new year is an excellent time to celebrate new beginnings by exchanging gifts with those you love."

"It's a gift for the tooth fairy so I used dental floss instead of ribbon."

'I hope you like it -- it's a stimulus package.'