Grooming Fan Gifts

'Now where did I lay my comb?'

'No more hairy legs for me, I'm waxing now...'

"Absolutely not!"

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

'...so I simply combined my love of beards with my love of tattoos and this was the result!'

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"If she's a write off can you let me know the scrap value?"

'It's a chinstache. They were popular in the 1800's, but now they're coming back.'

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

Hairstyles

Chuck played mean hair guitar.

Clock Tower Shadow

In the shaving cut operating room of a hospital.

"You must be new around here, pardner."

2050 A. D: Cloning is quite common place.

"Come on, let me cut your fringe! You look ridiculous!"

"Actually, Occam, the simplest explanation is that you need an electric razor."

Time to trim the eyebrows!

"Well sir. . . you could have a crew cut, flat top, a stiff quiff, a hi-top fade. . . "

Barber of Seville

After deliberating on the topic for weeks, I've decided to grow out my toenails. Why? My mane of hair is lustrous and thick. My musk is overpowering. My muscles, toned. Primal. Sinewy. My chest hair is coifed and glistening. But I can't rest on my laurels. The only way to maximize my animal magnetism at this point is to grow talons. I'm a victim of my success. And here I was worried about world peace.

Man heading towards the House of Mirrors with a shaving kit.

The edge on this blade gives a close shave. Guaranteed to last a lifetime.

"Could you just make it a little awkward for a few weeks?"

His movember moustache made him feel very distinguished.

181 yeard old, huh? This is the worst fake I.D. I've ever seen. And that beard! Ha! Nice try, Mr.... Uhh... 'Van Winkle.'

"Oh, no, not the messy hair bun!"

'Having limited funds, Irwin goes with the less expensive chest hair transplant.'

'Every year I say, 'Just a little of the top' but they never listen.'

Lion with hair straighteners.

Boy to Dad about broken razor: 'That's funny. It was working just fine when I groomed the dog this morning.'

For those important occasions when he had to look his best, Barry made sure to wear his anti-dandruff fan.

"Sorry I'm late. Had to floss."

"Give yourself a little cut darling. He wants a chance to patch you up."