Grooming Aficionado T-Shirts

"You've caught me at a bad time. I was just shaving my legs."

Easy shaving

"Normally, I encourage beards, but only Millennials."

'Oh, jeez! Look at that poor bastard! Ha, ha! Oh, man! Hee, hee, hee...'

'I just got so fed up with bumping into things all the time that I cut my fringe...'

"BEARD FOR HIRE! Good Rates!"

"Well. . . . we're still a few years away from self-driving razors."

Old Mice Aftershave

"I always sign my work, sir."

Yeti hunters drag it to a barbershop.

'D'you moisturise?'

Walrus Grooming.

"It's me, honest Ralph! My owner changed shampoo when she bathed me!"

'You're right, it probably gives too close a slave.'

It's not easy being a newly made vampire...

Ha ha, check out the guy with the dualbrow!

Authoritarian Razor.

Carl, his mustache, Jerald, and his eyebrows, Leonard and Reggie.

"Absolutely not!"

"I beg your pardon, but a mustache is required in the dining room. Would you like us to provide you with one?"

Beauty is in the eye of the manipulator.

"Be creative...!"

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

"So, how do you want it?"

"Wow, your mane looks fantastic! New conditioner?"

"Look on the bright side – the Rogaine worked!"

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

'You do a fine job guarding the place, we just need you to shed less.'

'Whoa,Man!...(Phew!)...Boy,that was a close shave!'

In the shaving cut operating room of a hospital.

How to Pick up a Safety Razor Blade

"Do you carry any shampoos that have been tested on little kittens?"

Georgian head-dress