Body Grooming Aficionado T-Shirts

'I think you could be onto something.'

"Absolutely not!"

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

"It's really quite simple: Shave off the soul patch and the car is yours."

'Straight eye for the queer guy.'

Man with long beard looks at centerfold in Beard Monthly magazine.

Dr. and Mrs. Steven Mueller.

'You do a fine job guarding the place, we just need you to shed less.'

'Slices Mandy! Just slices!'

In the shaving cut operating room of a hospital.

How to Pick up a Safety Razor Blade

'Whoa,Man!...(Phew!)...Boy,that was a close shave!'

"Do you carry any shampoos that have been tested on little kittens?"

"I beg your pardon, but a mustache is required in the dining room. Would you like us to provide you with one?"

"Come on, let me cut your fringe! You look ridiculous!"

"Well sir. . . you could have a crew cut, flat top, a stiff quiff, a hi-top fade. . . "

The humidity plays heck with Sampson's hair.

"Actually, Occam, the simplest explanation is that you need an electric razor."

Time to trim the eyebrows!

'Just the usual, thanks.'

"Yes dear, I'm sure if it were smaller the pepper mill would make a fine ear and nose hair trimmer."

'I just got so fed up with bumping into things all the time that I cut my fringe...'

The edge on this blade gives a close shave. Guaranteed to last a lifetime.

"Could you just make it a little awkward for a few weeks?"

"It's actually an ink stain but my wife has grown quite fond of it."

"BEARD FOR HIRE! Good Rates!"

'It's easy to follow the No Deodorant Kid.'

'Oh Darling, I just love the smell of your new aftershave...'

“It’s 2025 Roger, I didn’t think I’d still be seeing the lockdown beard..”

'Don't be ridiculous, Schaumberg! -- They didn't have Burma-Shave back then!'

Man heading towards the House of Mirrors with a shaving kit.

Lion with hair straighteners.

'Every year I say, 'Just a little of the top' but they never listen.'

'I wish you'd shave your chest - that's the second watch I've lost in there!'