Grocery Explorer Gifts

Alphabet soup

'Sorry, the bag boy's down with the flu,'

Do they have to grow frozen vegetables in the winter?

"It says these chicken nuggets are from parts unknown."

"They call him the avocado whisperer. He knows when they are about to turn."

"I'd recognize a fake anywhere."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

La Table

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

Heavy man sees 'Comfort Food' aisle

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"Milk, butter, bread - all past the expiration date. either he just hadn't noticed before, or his time machine worked."

'What wine goes with comfort foods?'

"You have a big check because you had a big wine."

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

"Everything is dandy--and our intestinal biomes are joyous."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

"I didn't invent the wheel. I invented the pizza."

'I love this supermarket; they have the easiest to understand wine department.'

"Joe's cereal. NPR co-approved."

'I'm filling in for the sommelier. We have a fine shiraz today for only $39. It's 14.7 alcohol, a Class 1B flammable, so if I see you consume it near an open flame, I'll have to cite you.'

"We can hit any creperie you want, sonny boy."

'Dorothy - we're not in the health food section anymore.'

Unusual Offers

'How was the squid?'

Apple section of supermarket - 'Granny Smith's'.

'Apparently the nutrients and the additives cancel each other out.'

Supermarket: Leafs, Rail Leafs

"Lumpy? Of course it's lumpy! Sweetbread soup is meant to be lumpy."

"Young man, the world is your oyster, but for God�s sake avoid peanuts, soy, milk, eggs, wheat, fish, tree nuts, and chocolate."

"I read that meat can remain undigested in one's intestines for five years...."

Food samples in supermarket - 'There's a stick in mine.'

Friendly bacteria

"Ah! I see you've found a cold beer to your liking, sir."