Green Eater Pillows

'Congratulations on your 100% plant-based diet. I'm referring you to a botanist.'

'I'm worried about him, he eats his vegetables, but not his dessert!'

Peas on Earth.

"Congratulations on your 100% plant-based diet. I'm referring you to a botanist."

"I don't see your point. I'm vegan, I expect veggies, and if they don't cater to my wants they're getting zero stars."

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

'The dietician told him to increase his roughage!'

The Jolly Green Giant Squid

All Natural Nothing

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

'All those vegetables Mom's been feeding me finally paid off. I'm a squash.'

"Two vegans, please."

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

'We'll never be able to eat it all before it spoils -- how about a rabbit or something instead?'

'Nowadays we want all our food to be ethically sourced, Personally I'd be happy if it was all chocolated sauced,'

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

The candy house, if the tale of Hansel and Gretel would happen today.

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

'Excuse me - are you organic?'

'Simple - it's your high-protein diet that keeps you so manic.'

'I won't tell my thighs if you don't..'

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

'For the first 500 calories of what we are about to receive, make us truly thankful.'

'We've only got a couple of days to finish this box of cereal. Mom'll never let us eat something called energy-packed after school's out.'

"All our donuts are hand fried in what will eventually become biofuel."

'This 'infrastructure' stuff you keep talking about -- does it have anything to do with vegetables?'

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

Mom's restaurant - 'You can't leave until you've eaten your greens.'

"Geoffrey's seasonal. I'm regional."

As I say, local produce, locally produced; all our meats tonight come form our local meat processing plant.

"I can't hurry when ordering. There's a lot of ecological geopolitics involved here."

Vegetarian Nightmare.

'Fish has mercury, meat has e-coli, veggies have pesticides, desserts cause obesity...so we'll have the health-concious nothing for dinner' special.'

Eat Locally - All Roadkill From 8-Mile Radius

'He's all eyes!'