Green Consumerism Gifts

"The most moral consumer - Didn't shop at Walmart - Didn't order things on Amazon unless it was, like, an emergency - Tried to be vegan - Always had an extra canvas bag in her car (which was a hybrid, by the way)"

"Good For You / Bad For You"

Nature versus commerce.

But is it organic?

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

"Wild-caught, farm-raised, lab-grown, beach-found, or aquarium-harvested."

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

See you at the farmers market!

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

"We're odd looking but just as good."

"This is locally grown and good for the environment, but it may give you greenhouse gas."

"Vegetables, vegetables, vegetables, welcome to my dystopian world!"

Veggie Hall of Fame.

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"They've got me doing cosmetics research."

"All our donuts are hand fried in what will eventually become biofuel."

Price may vary with weather.

"Plastic straws. No fish were spared in the making of this product."

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

Stuffing the turkey.

'I'm writing a vegetarian cook book.'

Supermarket Aisles: 'Good for the Environment' and 'Couldn't give a flying F@$#! about the environment!'

"I didn't realize there was so many different kinds of vegetables!"

"Secondhand books, reheated coffee"

"Do you carry any shampoos that have been tested on little kittens?"

"...and, for those parishioners who insist on a Eucharist made with all organic, locally-sourced ingredients, see Father Maguire at aisle three."

'Eat your lettuce. It'll put colour back in your cheeks.'

'Yes, the wood on this pencil is from a renewable source.'

'Could I have the traditional Christmas dinner but without meat or dairy and could guarantee it's organic and GM free.'

Pets: This animal has not been tested on products.

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

"I didn't know they could make so many entrees with vegetables!"

It all began with free-range chicken. Then it was organic vegetables. Next the farmers decided they should all take a year off to go find themselves.

'These fruits and vegetables are very colorful, large, free of blemishes, pulpy and tasteless.'