Green Beret Fan Gifts

'Do you have a Beret in a more subtle shade of green?'- Phillipa Tattersall, first female Green Beret.

"My dad says we eat honey 'cause it has lots of vitamin Bee."

Polar Bear ice fishing through igloo.

"Awww man. My nuts are so old they're wrinkled." "Tell me about it."

Poor guy fell asleep with his head in the sap.

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

"I've got you in my sights now, Mister Squirrel, with your fluffy tail and those tiny hands clutching that itty-bitty nut. Aww, you must be hungry...poor little fella... I love you, Mister Squirrel."

"Nuts to you, too."

A bear is sat on an armchair with old man slippers.

It's estimated that millions of trees are planted by forgetful squirrels.

"Now there's something you don't see everyday. How long have you been using dachshunds as sled dogs.?"

Baby rocks!

"The library rejected your request to ban all books on cats and squirrels. But, to be fair, it was no dumber than all the other book ban requests we get."

'You brought my slippers?... What kind of rescue dog are you?!'

Baby squirrel & Berries

Sisyphus visits Stowe

"Blast, you've cleaned me out again!" Grey squirrels out competing red squirrel for food.

"You have to pick the places you don't walk away from."—Joan Didion, Penny, Joan Didion.

Recalculating

"This tea isn't helping – I'm taking a gummy."

Too many of my babies became coats, so I decided to increase security...

"I can see you're a ski newbie."

'Oh, it is so totally on, now!'

Mountain Rescue for a Dog.

"You are aware that’s a golf ball?"

Possums that ski.

"It's unusual to see them reading this time of year."

'I do enjoy the winter olympics.'

Base jumper in squirrel suit sees splat shadow as he leaps from canyon wall.

"I love this time of year."

'The team we're playing tonight is good 'cause I heard they know how to turn and stop!'

'Class, let's welcome Timmy, our Exchange Student, who's joining us for the next three weeks...'

Death skis towards a man on thin ice

"Hope you don't mind—it was his last request."