Grease Avoider Gifts

Healthy Eating Centre Notice - Keep off the grease.

'I couldn't stand the heat, so I got out of the kitchen.'

A tube of toothpaste doesn't reach its full potential until in the hands of a baby.

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

Axle greaseMarine greaseElbow grease .

Cat mistakes bars for toilets.

"Mummy said dinner was brussels sprouts tonight. What about we drop by the park and see if the old man sitting on the bench can feed us instead?"

'They made it like that so the kids wouldn't bother you.'

"Mouse? No. They contain cheese and I'm lactose intolerant."

Pets are not only good companions, they're good excuses.

'I want to go out of town so that I can become a fully independent person, but near enough so that I can bring my laundry home.'

The life-changing magic of shoving everything into a huge Hefty bag and leaving it for somebody else to deal with.

"I still haven't cleaned up from the party."

"That'll be $7.88, 3000 calories and 500 grams of fat. Drive through please."

'It's not that I'm stupid. I'm lactose intolerant and on a diet.'

Wow, look what you've stepped in: Boy I'm glad I'm not the one having to lick it off...

'As a bachelor I have to wash my own clothes, clean my own room. The do it all again three months later.'

"And that's why we don't have nice things."

There's leftover apple crisp! Whoever finishes it up, please clean the baking dish. Hey! It's not finished!!

'Unfortunately, Mr.Beckons, your son Dean is very allergic to grass. . .'

REPLACING THE BURGER TANKS AT MR. BIG'S.

I don't get it. You can make a goal from one end of the field to the other, but you can't hit the laundry basket six inches away.

'Why can't you do that while I'm on the golf course?'

"I can't get the Grease soundtrack out of my head."

Healthy eating centre - keep off the grease.

"Jake, please hold my calls and fetch my Cheetos gloves."

The pair of socks waited confidently in the corner, secure in the knowledge that no matter what happens, no one ever suspects the socks.

Street Food Vendors

'Yeah, I guess I have kind of let it go.'

'That's the plan then, gang. We all move in with Bruno on bath nights!'

Indoor sauna.

"You're in my laundry's favorite seat."

No, you can't approach the bench if you have a cold.

'You want a plastic bag, for one tin of peas? Why don't you use your hands to carry it home? After all, they are reusable and friendlier to the environment.'

Changing your diet could save your life.