Graph Reader Gifts

"This graph shows a steady increase in absenteeism that is coming alarmingly close to 100 per cent."

Safety of cub/Distance from mama bear

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

'It's a chart of office morale. This is where you went on vacation.'

Project Length As Measured In Dog Years

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

"Maybe now, we could look at customer care'?"

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

Cariactures

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

'No swimming. No breathing.'

Man sees sign as he exits bathroom: 'Employees Often Wash Hands'.

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

'You'll be happy to see that I've finally managed to turn things around.'

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

No Immediate Danger

"Perhaps this slide whistle can better illustrate what this graph is telling us."

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

Sign in Lion Enclosure: 'Please Don't Eat the People.'

'Maybe the reason we don't have those 'off the chart' sales anymore is because our charts are too big.'

ACME Balloon Company.

"We've done a rigorous examination of your business plan using the latest algorithms to model future profits. . . which way up would you like it?"

Excess Baggage: By the time the male of the species admits he is lost. It is generally too late.

Let's Celebrate

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

He then drew a number of smaller pie charts behind the bigger chart. That helped to put it into perspective.

Sales chart plummets into employees head.

"At least we are consistently inconsistent."

Glass and Porcelain Store: Elephants must remain outside.

'Now this is my kind of green!'