Graph Gourmet T-Shirts

"Pie chart"

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

"Grass...Grass and more damn grass... What I wouldn't give for a lightly poached Dover sole with a garlic infused tarragon sauce."

"This is locally grown and good for the environment, but it may give you greenhouse gas."

"Vegetables, vegetables, vegetables, welcome to my dystopian world!"

Veggie Hall of Fame.

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"All our donuts are hand fried in what will eventually become biofuel."

"Put out the Asian sates, the Russian blinis, and the Mexican bean dips, while whip up something Korean."

Stuffing the turkey.

'I'm writing a vegetarian cook book.'

The Good Feud Guide - 'Delia Smith does a nice roasted Worrall-Thompson.'

'Can you pass me the saw-dust when you're finished with it Darling?'

"I didn't realize there was so many different kinds of vegetables!"

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

"...and, for those parishioners who insist on a Eucharist made with all organic, locally-sourced ingredients, see Father Maguire at aisle three."

"I didn't know they could make so many entrees with vegetables!"

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

'Eat your lettuce. It'll put colour back in your cheeks.'

Microwave confusion.

Vet to angry-looking dog: 'You ate some crabgrass, eh? Were you self-medicating again?'

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

"I certainly hope you're composting the leftovers."

"It needs a dash of gravel, I reckon."

Chicago School of Home Economics

'Mom always told us to eat the greens!'

Geographical Society Christmas Dinner.

Storefront reading "Net 'n' Nosh (Formerly Books 'n' Java)"

"The food was terrible, but my wife said it photographed well."