Grapevine Enthusiast T-Shirts

"There, there, it's not so bad - we did introduce the grapevine to your country."

Pete Townshend Vineyards

Wine Lady

"Umm ... not sure what notes you'll detect on your palate, but it'll get you ripped."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

Tarzan of the Grapes.

'Why, thank you. When they started the vineyard five generations ago, I heard they were shooting for freakin' awesome.'

'No, you're not calling at a bad time. I'm a professional wine taster - it's alwasys a good time.'

'This is the last time we hire former Cirque du Soleil members as stompers.'

"Can you recommend a wine that would compliment a divorce?"

"My wife commissioned a portrait of me."

Man with wine glass face looks unhappy.

A giant glass of red wine

"I'm just having fruit for dinner. Well, mostly grapes. OK, all grapes. Fermented grapes. I'm having wine for dinner."

An Excellent Nose for Wine.

Wine tasting

I never heard of chunky style wine. I couldn't find any seedless grapes.

'I, Dom Perignon, will now uncork the very first bottle of Champagne. Of course, I'm just guessing this is the right way to do it.'

"Soy milk and rice milk are okay but I prefer grape milk.".

'Now forget that I'm your boss and the CEO. How does my new product idea, Just the Lees, taste?'

"I spent all day looking for this Malbec, not that anybody cares."

"Thanks for inventing the god Dionysus. Now the whole country has a reason to drink more wine."

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

'Okay, you've got a mouthful of minerals, grapefruit, herbs and grass. Is it starting to taste like a sauvignon blanc?'

"This family-owned boutique wine is produced from a single grape."

'Bruce! 'ow many times must I tell 'ya? Only one wave of the bloomin' terroir flag over the fruit!'

'I think we can skip the resume.'

Cover Design for the Savoy (No. 4)

'Hey, if they can grow in Michigan...'

"To tourists this just looks like a pile of rotten and damaged grapes. But here at Trendy Vineyards, we look at it and see Special Select Reserve."

Schoolboy with lunch box.

"Hints of migrant workers on the nose."

"No, go ahead. I enjoy good gossipy hearsay."

"Grapes are my favorite fruit too."