Granola Gourmet Pillows

"How come you never get the kind of granola with the chocolate chips in it?"

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

'I'm a vegetarian.' - 'If it's so wrong to eat animals, why are they made out of meat?'

"Fee-fi-fo-fum, I smell Thursday's gluten-free lasagna!"

Queen of Quinoa

Kitchen Kapers

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

"This is locally grown and good for the environment, but it may give you greenhouse gas."

"Vegetables, vegetables, vegetables, welcome to my dystopian world!"

Veggie Hall of Fame.

"The bagels are better in New York."

Why Do Old Hippies Smile?

"Being vegan or vegetarian isn't enough anymore. From now on I will only cook stuff I stepped in on the sidewalk."

"All our donuts are hand fried in what will eventually become biofuel."

Stuffing the turkey.

"Put out the Asian sates, the Russian blinis, and the Mexican bean dips, while whip up something Korean."

'This is gluten free, isn't it?'

'I'm writing a vegetarian cook book.'

"I didn't realize there was so many different kinds of vegetables!"

"I didn't know they could make so many entrees with vegetables!"

"Say Gorgon-zola!"

Fermeture des restaurants: la résistance s'organise

'Eat your lettuce. It'll put colour back in your cheeks.'

"One slice—hold the bread."

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

"...and, for those parishioners who insist on a Eucharist made with all organic, locally-sourced ingredients, see Father Maguire at aisle three."

"When it's extremely cold out, I prefer flambés to winter stews."

Gluten-free Santa

'Are you sure you washed this salad?'

"She's passed out...quick! take her pulses!"

"I certainly hope you're composting the leftovers."

"I recommend the pimento loaf with pickle. It's bursting with umami."

"We grind our own catnip."

'. . . the Winter of Discontent Soup, Arab Spring Roll, Summer Madness Salad and The Season of Mellow Mists Fruit Medley.'

'Mom always told us to eat the greens!'