Granola Enthusiast Pillows

"I don't really consider oatmeal raisin cookies real cookies. They're more like little granola frisbees."

Tartine

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

'My body has rejected every diet I've tried.'

Rage.

He's in training for the rugby World Cup.

"I just want you to know that promotion, this office, and those Luna bars were mine!"

"I'm not eating cookies before dinner. I'm having cookies for dinner!"

"Bloody hell!"

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

Clown's Comedy Fart.

Love is when you watch television together.

'Take of the fruit and eat . . . Well, peanuts actually.'

'Burl says it only works with corn though if you want to try it.'

Budget Bureau. Ernie, spilling something from every food group on it, does not make it a "balanced" budget!

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

"Note the spike here, when the state legalized marijuana."

How The Sausage Is Eaten

"Funny. My girlfriend said the same thing."

Lioness Shops for Snacks.

'These hors d'oeuvres are real slop, and I mean that in the best sense.'

"We'd better stock up on TV snacks in the event of war."

'You'll enjoy our staff meetings. We always begin and end with the product.'

'I see you're still trying to get the staff enthused over the weekly meetings.' (Meeting offers free coffee, free snacks, eye-popping charts, exciting videos and free idea pads).

Medical Marijuana Dispensary / Medical Cheez Doodles Dispensary

Pope tarts.

Supermarket - World Cup Specials

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

"I'm you from the future! Or the past. I've completely lost track of time."

Sheltering in place.

"Goal!"

Why Do Old Hippies Smile?

'Just look at him. The face that lunched on a thousand chips.'

"The best thing about this, is the lovely honeycomb centre."

Back in 5 minutes!