Grade Booster Pillows

"Maybe I'd get better grades, Dad, if you came up with some kind of stimulus package."

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

'My grades at school have improved dramatically now that I'm wearing glasses...'

I should be a writer when I grow up...

"It's not fair! I only got 100 on my English test!"

"So the secret to getting good grades is to study hard...seems a little extreme!"

'Does the Fifth Amendment apply to report cards?'

'I got and 'E' in spelling.' - 'That is an 'F'.'

'I'm working because I've been upgraded. He never upgraded so he's out of work.'

'I'm partially passing my Meteorology course.'

Examiners.

"I see you got an A+++ in science."

"I think she marked yours in blue pen because she used up all her red on mine."

"Great! I've finally mastered all my competencies and my teachers still have most of their hair."

'After what you said about mine, guess whose Mum has just found in the attic?'

"I got an A in not being annoying!"

'Mistakes were made...'

"This grade doesn't fit into my five-year plan!"

"This is an improvement. You helped him study for his last test."

"I got an A+ on my math test! I'm updating my resume."

'No, Stanley, there isn't any margin of errors on math tests.'

"Your mother and I have seen your report card, and we've decided to distance ourselves from you."

"Second grade is tough, little brother. It's the year teachers no longer believe your dog ate your homework."

"I can't believe it...a 'B' average on my report card? I'm not that smart! The theories of probability predict it's likely that the school's data system somehow encountered a catastrophic breakdown."

Examiners Nightmare.

'If you aren't careful, son, you'll be mathematically eliminated from all of the Ivy League schools.'

'D-plus? -- I demand a recount!'

"Great. Now, can I see the unredacted version of your report card?"

'I was only promoted to fourth grade ten minutes ago, and I've already wiped third grade out of my mind.'

"It could be a false negative Maybe I should take the test again."

"Somewhere, there's an A with my name on it, but apparently not my address."

'Miss Figgs, as your Headmaster I feel it only fair to warn you that your exam marking is under investigation!'

'You need to get your grades up...because good grades are an early sign of good credit scores.'

"This test wasn't fair! No way it's an accurate measure of what I know!"

"My teacher forgot to congratulate me on my great math grade. She was too busy calling Ripley's Believe It Or Not."