Grade Upgrader Pillows

'I only got a C minus, but as soon as I get home, I'm planning on downloading an upgrade.'

'Teachers can't be bought off with apples today. Maybe if I gave her small kitchen appliances?'

"I can't believe how great my life is now: We used to live in an apartment, but now, I have my own garden..."

'Remember, Edward, inside every 'F' student is a 'D' student trying to get out.'

"If wisdom comes with age, what are we doing here at eight and a half?"

'Your report card grades are poor. Maybe you should stop building model airplanes. The glue is getting to you.'

'No animals were killed during the making of this book report....'

Resume Consultant. Listing professional development courses you've taken since your last job was fine, but don't put"New & Improved" above your name.

"This is an improvement. You helped him study for his last test."

"Second grade is tough, little brother. It's the year teachers no longer believe your dog ate your homework."

A fish jumping from a tank that reads "Tropical fish $5.00" into a tank that reads "Tropical fish $20.00"

"Listen kid, you may have been a big man on playground."

'Couldn't you just leave that here until we're sure the new system works?'

'I was only promoted to fourth grade ten minutes ago, and I've already wiped third grade out of my mind.'

'It's for the office computer. It's been replaced.'

It's the Fad Herald. I should've upgraded my phone. Hear ye. Today, a special announcement. The following is now in: Hope. Until further notice, that tingly, expectant feeling you're experiencing may be interpreted as optimism, mild euphoria, the illusion of better times ahead. Wow. Now that you mention it. Cool. Wait ... What do you man by illusion? Looking ahead to 2020 trends: Disappointment. Nah. We'll be fine, I'm sure.

Anyhow, thanks for listening, Rudy. It's part of the job. I guess you're right: the move to 3rd grade is a big one. There are lots of changes. You've just got to roll with it. And buy a new video game console? It eases any transition. How did you get to be so smart? Playing lots of video games.

"Wherever he is, I know he'll be upgraded."

"Every time I offer them an upgrade, they click on 'not now'."

"Maybe I'd get better grades, Dad, if you came up with some kind of stimulus package."

"If you're going to use a TV as your computer monitor, I suggest investing in a new model."

'My grades at school have improved dramatically now that I'm wearing glasses...'

'Let's just see how intuitive this software really is.'

"I wish I hadn't rushed out and bought this model, your new model is much better!"

"I've managed to beat the taxman, I had a coffee in Starbucks, upgraded my Vodaphone and did some shopping on Amazon."

"My husband is much like his computer. . . a constant work in progress."

'Hello, tech support? How do I know if I'm using the latest version of the internet?'

"Just think, next year I'll be in fourth grade. I'm really going to miss the third grade...but going to the fourth grade is a wise career move for me."

Computer nerd sits at do-it-yourself upgraded computer.

Man in small hotel room phones room service: 'Room service? Send me up more room.'

"It finally finished the update! But it started the update in 2004!"

'With this new graphite driver I'll hit the ball straighter and with these new super distance balls I'll hit it 30 yards further.'

"I made a new year's resolution to bring home a report card I could be proud of, but Stephanie Hart wouldn't give me hers."

"We need a new GPS."

"Psssst. Fix your report card?"