Gourmet Food Shop Owner Gifts

Specialty Items

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

The wonderful world of cheese.

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

Organic Produce: No Pesticides, Herbicides or Bad Vibes.

Important Food Groups

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"Is there any way I can un-drink this wine?"

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

French wine

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

'No, I'm not the sommelier; in fact, I don't even work here - I've just always wanted to try this wine.'

His Her Cakes

"It comes with a small Greek salad."

"They always throw us stale bread, so I've decided to bake my own, fresh break..."

Craft Donuts vs. Craft Beer

'Don't let him pick the wine. He thinks Dom Perignon was someone who got knocked off on the Sopranos.'

PREPARING A POMEGRANATE FOR DUMMIES

"Deep-dish pizza calls for deep-glass beer."

'You're lucky there, Sir. That's the last one in the world.'

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

'So it's the Mumm's Cordon Rouge, '98 Pouilly-Fuisse, '86 Chateau Margaux, and the '92 Barsac - would you like any food?'

"Well I wouldn't eat it, but don't let that put you off."

"Now, in contrast to the last olive oil you tasted, this one is infused with sixty-five more dollars."

"Regular service or affected?"

'I'm sorry, sir, but it's hats off for the Chef's Special!'

"I always end up buying way more black-truffle honey than I intended."

'You want to eat out tonight? -- What if we get addicted to good food?'

'You'll find it has a bouquet reminiscent of cherries and chocolate, a silky texture and best of all, for me, a 72% gross margin.'