Gourmet Experiences Gifts

"Which wine would you pair with the complimentary bread and butter?"

'A cheeky red?'

'Please remember, it's the ambience you're paying for here.'

"One man's dirty water is another man's Earl Grey."

"Your food didn't melt, young man... this is the soup course."

"I know you didn't order the snails, sir. They're complimentary with the salad."

The wonderful world of cheese.

"When I was your age. I was really smelly."

'This is one of our most recent vintages!'

La Table

'Plastic corks, then screw caps; when they come out with a flip-n-sip Chateau Petrus I'm hanging up my tastevin.'

"So this coffee shop if your 'hangout'?"

"I just finished your manuscript and I found the ending delicious."

"And I'm teaming that burned sausage up with a warm, flat local lager."

'The heart and eyes feel nothing, but the stomach and ears are completely infatuated.'

"You say your crème needs more Brulée?"

"...But ASIDE from that, how was your trip to France?"

"I feel like we are the polyester of dairy products."

'Wait until you taste the artisanal water. It's not to be believed.'

'Waiter...my entrée fell over.'

It turns out they don't go together so well,

Jeff soon discovered his mistake in ordering the one ton soup.

"I come here for the pepper."

To do before Saturday...

'I'm sure M'lady will appreciate the mashed potatoes. Our chef uses only grass-fed single-udder butter.'

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

Every time you make a blend, somewhere, a wine maker dies.

"I cook the sausages in French mineral water, I wear a French beret and I can call you 'Monsieur'."

French wine

"Yes, we have blue cheese. Do you want it in electric, sky or navy blue?"

"Hmmm... low ash content. Smells like someone switched to canola oil... wait, is that tripe I smell?"

The Main Types of Cheese

"Everything taste so divinely artisanal."

"I forgot to take a pic of the tacos."

"Hmmm ... you're right — I forgot the brie."