Gothic Rock Fan Pillows

'Apparently they're better than The Cure.'

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

Frankenstein working at a hot dog stand.

"Quoth the raven, 'Nevermore.'"

"Where’s your sense of Gothic romance?"

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

Nevermore. You don't have to use "air quoths" every time.

Trilby - Finis

Orientation: Welcome to Hell

"I guess I misunderstood when I read you were into 'Bodybuilding'."

'You've got those 'take-me-to-bed' eye sockets!'

Bram Stoker

'You complete me.'

First Transsylvanian Blood Bank

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

"Relax - he's just here for the romance."

'Oh great, these guys again! The big guy can't fit inside the MRI scanner, sheet boy falls right through it, and The Count's images never develop...'

Trilby - 'Taffy was allowed to see Gecko'.

Frank N. Stein - Evirnomentalist.

Vampire Umbrella

The Pride of Frankenstein

'At last, dusk...and my e-mails!'

Drunk Vampire

"I won't be long, I'm just delivering some bad news."

Get Your Shot

'I've checked his appointments. The only opening is for 'nevermore'.'

"Have you tried turning him off and on again?"

"It was our grandmother's wedding dress—we had her exhumed so you could wear it."

Here's one for you... she likes long lurches in the moonlight, scared of fire... enjoys terrorizing villages...

"You came from Europe, didn't you? I'll bet this is metric."

Transylvania Lecture Hall. Tonight Count Dracula will speak about lessons he learned looking back over a long life. I thought vampires didn't reflect.

"You lab assistants are all alike, you're only interested in a woman for one thing...her brain!"

'My doctor's put me on a strict diet. From now on I have to ask my victims how high their cholesterol is.'

Vampire practical jokes.