Gothic Mansion Lover Pillows

"Oh s**t, it’s ICE!"

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

'Alone for the weekend at last!'

Trilby - 'Je prong!'

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

"Where’s your sense of Gothic romance?"

"The previous tenant was a bit of a shut-in."

"Nevermore." "You don't have to use 'air quoths' every time."

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

"What'd you think the zipper on my face was for?"

Trilby - 'Oh my poor girl! my poor girl!'

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

'It's a little varietal I bottle myself...Type A positive.'

The Raven in Flight

Nick Cave

Cosmetic Stone Mason.

Trilby - 'Ca fera une fameuse crapule de moins'

"Graveyards always put me ill at ease."

Trilby - 'Oh don't you remember sweet Alice, Ben Bolt?'

Bride of Frankenstein charges her phone

"No monster, when I said 'lend me a hand'..."

"You never know what will catch on!"

'Count Dracula, I wish you'd come to me sooner...'

"I know we're not supposed to invite them over the threshold dear, but it seemed awfully rude to leave him standing on the doorstep."

Trilby - Mademoiselle Ernestine singing 'Les Cloches du Monastere'.

'R.I.P. Van Winkle, just sleeping.'

The Goblin and the Sexton

"Wait! First, his attorney."

Trilby - 'Malbrouck s'en va-t'en guerre'.

"I figured I've got the money so why not spend it."

"I'll have a Bloody Mary. And bring a Witch Hazel and tonic for the little woman."

"Never think outside the box!"

Till life do you part.

Edgar Allan Poe

Count Alucard's Night-Care Center.