Gothic Humour Lover Pillows

' and what blood group are you ?. Don't tell me , let me guess....'.

"Here we are."

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

Frankenstein working at a hot dog stand.

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"So besides opera and lurking, what do you do to relax?"

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

"....and hold the garlic."

She kept Dracula at bay with an episode of the Archers.

"It's creepy thinking that Santa can sneak into my house undetected. I must find out how he does it!"

First Transsylvanian Blood Bank

'Oh great, these guys again! The big guy can't fit inside the MRI scanner, sheet boy falls right through it, and The Count's images never develop...'

"You never know what will catch on!"

"Wait! First, his attorney."

'He won't bite anyone! I'm hoping it's just a phase.'

'Wow! Did you see who just flitted past? Count Dracula!'

Vampire Couple, "I suppose you're out again for your usual eight pints?"

Trilby - 'For Gecko'.

'This feels a bit strange: Are you really from the Blood Bank?'

Fresh Blood In Politics

Count Alucard's Night-Care Center.

Trilby - 'Malbrouck s'en va-t'en guerre'.

Death Takes A Time-Share

'Which one do you think Dracula's in?'

Janet Leigh caricature

"So, Claire tells me you ate her parents last night."

"I've been transferred to the Transylvanian section"

"The meal was delicious. My compliments to the Haematologist"

"As a vegan vampire I suck but I don't swallow."

"Now be honest, does it make me look younger?"

"Our relationship would never work, Megan! We'd always be at each other's throat!"

"Dang it! Honey, this whole batch of type B positive has gone sour!"

"Is that your resting witch or resting bitch face. . .?"

"Ugh! Damn floss..."